To say this has been a week from hell would be an understatement.
We went on “vacation” this week and while it was nice to connect with the in laws and get away it wasn’t a vacation for me. I got little to no sleep. Lil one slept horribly. Kept waking up and freaking out cause he didn’t know where he was. Couldn’t sleep in the car cause let’s face it my lovely hubs can’t stay awake behind the wheel.
With no sleep my body starts to fall apart. And it is a huge trigger for my PPD. That’s post partum depression. The first time I knew I was in trouble this week was when my in laws took us to this play place for lil one. He was playing with a toy train when another little girl came and took it from him. Normal kids stuff right.? Not for me.. As soon as he started to cry I wanted to cry too. Like she took the toy from me.
That was my first sign. On the 8 hr trip home I was very snippy with my hubs. And he let me know it. Which is what I needed. Thats the wonderful thing about having support. Yeah they are there to hold you but they are also there to tell u enough.
We get home, still no sleep. Lil one has caught a cold and hubs is sick. And I’m sorry for any men reading this, but men turn into babies when they are sick. Now not only am I snippy but I have lack of motivation. I’m a bit of a neat freak and well my house was a mess!
Sign number two no motivation
I thought that once I got some sleep things would get back to normal….. NOT! Today I have been very snippy with the hubs, almost wished he would have slept in the other room.. Not the normal me… I had a two year old temper tantrum because lil one threw clean close on the floor…. What the hell am I doing?…. While driving I kept thinking what it would be like to drive off the road and hit a road construction sign…. Where did those thoughts come from?…. Then to top it off full on panic attack while look for a place to live… Really really!… I keep thinking maybe I am still recouping from lack of sleep.. At least I hope… And that it’s good that I’m recognizing the signs, but that doesn’t help when I’m in the thick of it.
Is it time to call the doc? I don’t know… Gonna wait another week see if I can make it out of this quick sand or will someone need to throw me some rope.? Wish me luck….