Gonna do it

So I found out that yet another person I know is pregnant. And my jealousy hit the roof!! I know so silly. But I can’t help what I feel. I so so want another baby! I loved being pregnant, and labor and just having a baby. And I know lil one would be wonderful with a sibling. He was not meant to be an only child.
And If hubs came to me and said let’s start trying I would jump right on it exactly what u are thinking But he’s not going to. He’s a plan kinda guy and our plan is to wait until April to start trying. That way insuring lil one will be 3 when the next one comes.
So we shall wait. And you know it’s just gotta be ok with me. I can’t keep going on feeling like this. It’s not healthy for me or my family. So I’m starting my goal.
I want to lose lbs before I get pregnant, have lil one potty trained, and have my unschooling organized. Oh and to be a better melistof4
I can’t keep worrying about what others are doing. I need to take care of my universe. Grow up a bit. Be a REAL woman. 6 months from Christmas I’m gonna be 30 ahhhhh and to me that’s a big deal. Right?
No more worrying about why people may or may not like me. Both in the real and cyber world. I am who I am and that’s all that I am. I’m done trying to “fit in” I’m in or I’m out. I have a good core group of friends. Rick, Ann, my hub, and my sisters Keshia and Jaira. I’m making some in the cyber world. Hayley and others to come I hope!? And that’s what matters.
I guess thats what you figure out as you get older. Turn 30, you realize what life really is about, and the people and things that mean the most to you.
So today I’m working on my workout. No New Years resolution cause those are meant to break. I’m gonna lose lbs before I get pregnant so that I’m happy with my body after baby. I also really want to try natural labor if at all possible. As a person who has been through labor once; I realize how in shape you must be to handle it.
I’m currently working on potty training. Little one is doing great and we even added pants to the mix. YIPPY
I’m doing lots and lots of research on unschooling. Even made a few crafty items.
And I’m working through my ppd. I want to understand it more and how better to deal.
I’m gonna do it gosh darn. I’m gonna really do this. Failure is not an option. 30 here I come!


6 thoughts on “Gonna do it

  1. Thank you for singling me out as a friend. I am honoured to be thought of as such. I know we live an ocean apart but twitter has brought us together…that and our boys.
    You should also be thankful. Thankful that you have a husband who loves you and is devoted to you. Thankful that you have a strong, healthy boy to whom you are the centre of his world . You are stronger than you think. Be kind to yourself and give yourself some credit for being a great wife, a life partner, a wonderful mom, a cherished sister and last but not least a great friend…x

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